After a couple of nights feeling sorry for myself and getting rejected from more job applications I started to truly consider my hideousness. My self-esteem hit the ultimate low. I basically had a serious melt down that included me weeping on my living room floor in the middle of the night. I couldn’t control my crying and simply started to pray. I prayed so fervently that I couldn’t quite keep my prayers straight, but I kept asking God or someone for an answer. I cried until I finally fell asleep.
I know this might sound over dramatic, but after being unemployed for such a long time and getting very little positive feed back I feel like there is very little room for me to progress. I finally told my family and friends how I was feeling and I got the usual “Don’t worry, it will work” or the “Why are you so depressed, don’t you know there are people who are way worse than you are?!”, and then one of my dearest friend mentioned a new study she saw on AOL.com. She noted how the article pointed out to a beautiful ratio. That it is proven that people prefer to see people who are symmetrical and have a 46% ratio of Face to eye separation. That means that there is an actual number assigned to a beautiful face. Needless to say I felt worse and she jokingly remarked “At this rate you probably want to get plastic surgery!” and laughed ahead of me, but it hit me. I’m depressed by the lack of jobs and the overemphasis on looks. I’ve always hated my nose and chin. I have some free time between job applications, so why not get some worked done on my face!
It was an off-hand comment, but it stayed with me the whole day. If looks are that important in the job market then this can only be categorized as an investment on myself. I have the training and I do have some money saved. I know I need to pay off my bills, but if by doing this plastic surgery I am able to land a job I will be able to pay back these bills. I know this isn’t a decision I should jump into so quickly so I will do some research and talk to people. If anyone knows any plastic surgeons or just someone who has had surgery please let me know. I would love any input.
All the best,